TSA workers are generally among the least valued government employees. But these days, many travelers passing through airports take a moment to express their gratitude to dismissed workers work their hours without being paid as the partial government shutdown continues.
In my research as a communication specialist, as I explain in my book, « The art of recognition.” I can tell you that gratitude matters. The words we use to describe our emotions are important because they influence how we and others feel.
Here are my three rules for practicing gratitude.
1. Practice gratitude daily
Two recent books – historian Diana Butler Bass’ “Grateful: The Transforming Power of Giving Thanks” and journalist AJ Jacobs’ “Thank you a thousand times: a journey of gratitude” – share details of the personal, social and health benefits of gratitude.
These books tell how gratitude can lower blood pressure, reduce anxiety, improve sleepand make people happier and more at home in the world. In general, research shows that the practice of gratitude reduces suffering and promotes individual well-being.
So practicing gratitude every day is important – but it also requires the right philosophy.
2. Avoid the language of debt
Many of us regularly say, “I owe you one,” “I owe you a debt of gratitude,” or some other phrase that basically means the same thing.
In doing so, gratitude becomes a kind of debt incurred during daily life.
The domain of positive psychology studies what makes life more worth living. According to the positive psychologist Robert EmmonsBe grateful “is to feel indebted.” To paraphrase Emmons, when someone does me a favor or gives me a gift, the emotion of gratitude encourages me to view it as a debt that I must repay.
The problem with the language of debt is that it turns the way we talk about gratitude into a transaction. Gratitude becomes a daily practice of counting and scoring. People then become good at seeing their lives like a series of debts which must be reimbursed. But life is not a debt or a succession of debts.
According to Aristotle in hisEthics in Nicomaqueit is natural for people to despise feeling indebted to others. And so, he argues, it is also natural for people to turn away from relationships with others if those relationships serve to create further debt.
3. Recognize interdependence
Besides being an academic, I am a yoga teacher. My academic research is deeply influenced by the philosophy of yoga. Yoga is a practice that aims to reduce suffering. According to the yoga specialist Michael Stone“the term ‘yoga’ connotes the basic unity and interconnectedness of all life.”
In America, it is common to speak of autonomy. But no one succeeds alone. Everyone is supported. The yogic practice of gratitude, or ‘santosha’, encourages practitioners to recognize and thank for the many forms of support that allow them to live their lives.
To breathe is to breathe in the same air that others breathe; to stand is to stand on the same ground as others. Without the air, or the earth, shared by all, we would not be here. The practice of yogic gratitude encourages people to recognize that they are part of the world, not separate from it.
It also teaches people to recognize that to reduce their suffering, they must also work to reduce the suffering of those around them. Often people don’t see it that way, but there is no injustice that affects someone else that doesn’t also affect all of us in some way.
fight injustice
In the end, it’s heartwarming to see Americans thanking, fundraisingand provide food to government employees affected by the closure.
But, true gratitude is a practice of acknowledging our interconnectedness – that we’re all in this together. If people practice the three rules of gratitude, maybe they can also recognize the injustice to ask people to work without pay and to commit to fighting this injustice together.
